Immerse Yourself in This Marvellous World of Learning

I have learned that it is a world of learning out there! (Sometimes: everything is possible.) And we all know that you could be building your knowledge and intuition this very moment.

So, let’s get you linked out to some vast resources:

The Xenaversity of Minnesota

On this planet, there is so much to learn. But now, Xena is here. And now some of us are even further behind. Sorry, guys, you’re going to have to go to Xenaversity.

They have their own cupid.

The Xenaversity of Minnesota is dedicated to upholding a very high moral conduct among its faculty and assorted cyber-collegiates. In fact, I insist that its charter is what keeps the place from crumbling. I think of it more as a disciplinary institution personally.

One of the highest crimes around campus is the email transgression. Which is dealt with in the same spirit of bluntness and immortality that Xena herself conveys.

Email disciplinary steps are as follows:
First offense: Emailed or verbal warning
Second offense: One-month suspension from one or both email lists
Third offense: Permanent removal from one or both email lists
Any further disciplinary action if needed, will be brought to the club for a vote.

And I would say that “further disciplinary action” could involve simply brandishing a two-handed broadsword and bringing it down right into that part of the delinquent’s skull where these nasty e-mail thoughts are taking hold.

On to…

The Online International Journal of Buffy Studies

...at Slayage-dot-TV. And in cooperation with Middle Tennessee State University.

International. All nations. Working together to build a Buffy mindshare. To come to a cultural crossroads, wherein all of mankind’s wisdom is distilled into one weekly teen fantasy-goth soap, staffed by hot chicks and cool guys.

(Furthermore: The Academic Buffy Bibliography.)

Thing is: you’re not going to keep up with the Buffy folk. Take this complete thesis, a staggering 108-page treatise on William the Bloody.

This thesis is based on Lydia the Watcher’s line in the episode “Checkpoint” (Buffy season 5). On first meeting Spike she says in awe, “I wrote my thesis on you!”

We submit this collaborative effort as the thesis Lydia wrote. We have given her the last name Chalmers.

Yeah. That’s like three times longer than the Guide. And the Guide has consumed my life for three months!

I’m sure there is a lot of validity to all of this research. I wouldn’t know because, despite the volumes of backstory and constant nodding in the series to every intellectual artifact known to man, there’s still a lot of cheesy lines. Tough guy stuff. But, sometimes: puppets.

Centre for Xena Studies

(Although, in the curriculum outline, it’s spelled: centre.)

Eventually, we all have to face the reality that education will never cater to all of our needs. For example, you may not get into Xena. But, it’s time to face the facts: Most accredited colleges are switching to her.