Incident No. 24: Speaking Of Flutes

I am authorized to speak of flutes and certain floutists, one of whom was interested in furthering his career and in forcing flutework to the forefront of pop culture. So this floutist, he parachuted into small towns, playing trills all the way down.

The first town he landed in was called Eccles. He captivated the crowd below, but fell straight through a new walnut bureau, crafted by a local artisan. Newpapers read: “Stray Piper Strikes Through Solid Drawers” or such nonsense.

Fall came and he orchestrated a second drop over a larger city, Merriwealth. And, again, bedazzlement. People loved it. The city pool was also opening that day. Sadly, no ripples were made in its surface. And a child left his pet bat’s cage open. A suit store was robbed. The printed headlines broadly rang, “Charm Upon City Unstitches One Tailor’s Already Threadbare Pockets.”

And the floutist also saw Rascot. A town which is nothing but forest. The preceding day, the town was ravaged by an upright dog. The floutist ran for ten miles before the monstrous dog overtook him and bellied him whole.

So, from the newspapers: “Dog Man At Last Acts Favorably.”